ASIA

well, i leave in a little over 24 hours now for one of my favorite places ever. there is a distinct smell of asia...and i can already smell it just a little. i'm not even gone yet! haha!

i wish i could update this while i am gone, but alas, i will not be able to. the risk is too great. however, you my faithful blog readers can do me a favor.

PRAY.

i am so so excited to be going, but along with that come many worries and fears. all of which are nothing when you take into account the wonderful job God has bestowed upon me to do. nothing makes me more excited than sharing Jesus. and nothing would be more worth dying for.

here are a few things to be praying for.

health, safety, local christians, NON BELIEVERS, workers on the field already, me, my team, and God to use us in the most awesome way possible! see you in a few weeks!

worst weekend of my life

well, usually my weekends start on Thursdays since that is my last day of work for the week...sort of. i work t/w/th/s so...it is a kinda. anyways, i pull up to work on thursday after being asked to come in early....to chat with my boss. see, my boss is my discipleship leader...so i really thought nothing of it. well, she tells me to clock in (1st warning sign since i'm 30 minutes early) and then it begins. she starts to tell me that because enrollment is so low for next year, she is having to let people go. she is only having one aide...and there are not enough students for an afternoon class. therefore, leaving me without a job after this coming Thursday. complete bummer.

so that happens...and it didn't really hit me until around lunch. and it hit me hard. all the wondering of what i would do for all the bills, helping out the family, and all those things that you usually think about after losing a job. granted, i still have another part time job, that maybe gives me ten hours a week...so going from 31 to 10...is quite a loss.

then i got called to go into work on Friday for a teacher. that was fine, but on the way home...little did i know something was wreaking havoc on my body. my throat became sore on one side. i thought nothing of it...until i woke up saturday morning with a sore throat that felt like someone was stabbing me in the esophagus everytime i swallowed. absolutely horrible. so, i got some antibiotics and am still taking them, but man, they don't work fast enough. my throat feels loads better, however my nose is so stuffy. just can't win.

and, on top of all this, i leave for asia in 5 days. that adds another stress since they are checking temperatures on the plane because of the whole swine flu. but, GOD IS IN CONTROL....even though i can't figure out why this is happening. He is in control, and i have to trust that.

exhaustion

you know when you get to that point...the one when all you want to do is sleep? that is me right now. literally and figuratively.

i am in the midst of chaos...seriously. from school ending, to babysitting, to leaving in 11 days for Asia, i am seriously exhausted. non-stop for me...maybe a little too much lately. the only time i feel rested, is my daily time with God. i know you hear it all the time, "spend time in the Word and you will feel better," but its really true. i have been reading through this preparation guide thing for my trip...and it has a bunch of scriptures to read, but i have been reading it at night. it seriously prepares me for sleep. i know that sounds funny, but when i wake up i feel rested...which never usually happens (especially when you go to bed at midnight and have to get up at 5am).

for now...i just need rest. rest in His sweet presence and rest on my pillow.

i will rise

for lack of something better to write...i am going to comment on these lyrics by Chris Tomlin from his song I Will Rise:


There's a peace I've come to know
Though my heart and flesh may fail
There's an anchor for my soul
I can say "It is well"

Jesus has overcome
And the grave is overwhelmed
The victory is won
He is risen from the dead

And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise

There's a day that's drawing near
When this darkness breaks to light
And the shadows disappear
And my faith shall be my eyes

Jesus has overcome
And the grave is overwhelmed
The victory is won
He is risen from the dead

And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise

And I hear the voice of many angels sing,
"Worthy is the Lamb"
And I hear the cry of every longing heart,
"Worthy is the Lamb"


And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise


good grief this song hit me. i was driving to small group on monday night, and Jesus surrounded me as i drove. there is a peace i've come to know, though my heart and flesh may fail, there's an anchor for my soul, i can say 'it is well.' i mean...Jesus is the peace. we have complete victory through His death and resurrection. how glorious will that day be when He calls my name. oh my goodness, i cannot even fathom it.

if there is one thing i wish to do with my life, it is to glorify Jesus Christ and make His name known.

prayers of the saints.

you may be asking me if i know the Dave Barnes song called "prayers of the saints." and if you know me...you know i do...because Dave Barnes is my absolute favorite musician. but...besides that, the title of that song got me thinking...especially as of late.

there is nothing like having fellow believers pray for you. its kind of like this spiritual army that you rally around yourself to help protect you from the onslaught of the Devil. this past week, after i had done my quiet time, the Devil attacked me.

i have always had dreams. some have been strange and funny....others have been a sort of movie like scene where i am the "dream girl" who has someone falling in love with me (really...what girl doesn't dream of that at some point?). this dream though, was unlike any other. it was a nightmare beyond terrifying. i can't really tell you the details, because i don't really remember them. i just remember this figure...the ugliest thing i have ever seen...and it absolutely terrified me. i knew the Devil was attacking me in preparation for my trip, but the only defense i could come up with (which was the best defense) was to start praying scripture. every verse i could possibly think of popped in my head and i prayed it. i finally fell asleep. slept like a baby after that.

the next day i texted some friends and shared at bible study what had happened. and wouldn't you know it...prayer works. i don't know why we think it takes forever...because it doesn't. well, sometimes it seems that way, but its just our lack of listening for the answer. anyways, i honestly felt the presence of God the rest of the week. i still do. its like i have ten angels surrounding me at all times. like God has put some sort of shield around me protecting me from the flaming arrows of the Devil.

so, all that to say...pray for your friends, family, enemies, anyone you can think of, because even in the midst of chaos, He is the only constant.

Psalm 18:39
You armed me with strength for battle; you made my adversaries bow at my feet.